Financial Products Spun Just for You
From personal loans to savings accounts, Daddy's got a product for every need.
Web Equity Loan
from 4.8% APRLeverage the equity in your existing web. Whether it's a modest corner web or a sprawling orb web estate, we'll help you tap into its value.
- ✓ Fixed rates from 4.8%
- ✓ Terms 12-60 months
- ✓ Borrow up to 80% of web value
- ✓ No web appraisal fee
Silk-Backed Personal Loan
from 5.2% APRBacked by the strongest natural fiber on earth. Use for debt consolidation, home improvements, or a corner renovation.
- ✓ Unsecured (silk guarantee)
- ✓ Up to $50,000
- ✓ Funds in 24 hours
- ✓ Soft silk pull won't affect credit
Fly-By-Night Emergency Loan
from 7.9% APRNeed cash fast? We don't judge. Daddy's here for you at 3 AM.
- ✓ Same-day funding
- ✓ No questions asked
- ✓ Available 24/7
- ✓ Flexible repayment
Egg Sac Savings Account
2.1% APYWatch your money hatch and grow. Daddy's watching over it.
- ✓ 2.1% APY
- ✓ No minimum balance
- ✓ No monthly fees
- ✓ FSWIC insured up to $250,000
Corner Office Business Loan
from 6.1% APREvery corner is prime real estate. Fund your business expansion.
- ✓ Up to $500,000
- ✓ Terms up to 120 months
- ✓ No early repayment penalty
- ✓ Dedicated account spinner
Refinance Your Web
from 3.9% APROutgrown your old web? Let Daddy help you spin a new one.
- ✓ Rates from 3.9%
- ✓ Save up to $2,400/year
- ✓ Free web assessment
- ✓ Seamless web transition
Compare Our Rates
| Product | Rate | Term | Max Amount | Best For |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 🕸️ Web Equity Loan | from 4.8% APR | 12-60 months | 80% of web value | Web homeowners |
| 🧵 Silk-Backed Personal Loan | from 5.2% APR | 12-60 months | $50,000 | Everyone (especially flies) |
| 🪰 Fly-By-Night Emergency Loan | from 7.9% APR | 3-24 months | $10,000 | Night owls and panickers |
| 🥚 Egg Sac Savings Account | 2.1% APY | No term | Unlimited | Patient parents |
| 🏢 Corner Office Business Loan | from 6.1% APR | Up to 120 months | $500,000 | Ambitious corner-dwellers |
| 🔄 Refinance Your Web | from 3.9% APR | 12-360 months | Current web value | Web upgraders |
All rates are subject to credit approval, web inspection results, prey availability, and atmospheric humidity. The APR you receive may differ based on your silk credit score, number of functional legs, and web real estate value. DaddyLongLoans reserves the right to adjust rates based on seasonal fly migration patterns. Not responsible for webs damaged during the application process.
Not sure which product is right for you?
Talk to one of our 8-legged advisors and find the perfect product for your financial web.